“His greatest fear was to die in that hospital bed with all those machines around him and no one noticing. It was so good to have him at home…”
At 45 years old, my friend still misses her Dad. In many ways it doesn’t matter how old you are- the death of your parents does make you feel “orphaned” in so many ways. But she is also grateful and feels content that he died without fear. “…He was home with all of us…he was very sick but his medical care and all our love cared for him. ”
The memories of a life well lived can get faded as we are surrounded by doctors, nurses, the smell of hospital and those beeping machines. The anxiety of the person dying and those that love him or her often override decision making and finding a sense of peace.
It would seem that the fear of death is often overpowered by the fear of hospitalisation or medicalisation. It’s where we are most vulnerable. It’s where we lose control and have to trust so many strangers with our most intimate of needs.
Of course we don’t like talking about this. We think by doing so, it will bring us closer to the whole “death” thing. Not true. Living well in the end is what it’s all about.
CCNB is talking about dying and working with others to live well in the end.